Fiducia!!

I can't even write a blog about what I want to because of the exact thing I need to be writing.
I can't trust myself enough to let down a wall...or two or three. I don't know how I feel towards anyone or anything because I simply stopped feeling. But I'm standing my ground this time and I'm not running. I KNOW I am vulnerable. I am oh so vulnerable, and shame on you if you use that to your advantage. This isn't a pity cry, it's a word vomit full of frustration and bitterness and hope. Hope that I can find it in my heart to not just accept things as they are, but to find someone who's willing to walk through the fire with me. And trusting them wholeheartedly after I have found them.

“Trust the instinct to the end, though you can render no reason”
Ralph Waldo Emerson

“I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish He didn't trust me so much.”
Mother Teresa

“We get so focused on micromanaging God and His Kingdom that we forget to realize that He is more than capable of handling things on His own!”
-Bridget Willard

“We're never so vulnerable than when we trust someone - but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy”